Old Southendian 1^st XI 5 – 0 Royston 1^st XI

Scorers: Peoples, Catchpole x 2, O’Kill, Parker

MOM: Nick, DOD: Trunchpole

Morale was high in the camp as we boarded the Fun Tank and drove to the imposing surroundings of the Bassingbourn Barracks in Cambridgeshire. After gaining security clearance, Captain Calvin led the battle hardened souls of Old Boys 1^st Company onto the base. After a bleep test and an assault course for warm-up, we encountered the enemy insurgents from Royston.

You get the idea, army reference after army reference after army reference. Wing Commander Catchpole with 2 goals, Defense Unit Specialists Chandler and Cawcutt with crucial interceptions in tight spots, Weapons Specialist Peoples with an incisive drag-flick to open the firing – playing on an army base is like shooting fish in a barrel for a sports writer on the lookout for cheap gags.

In truth, the base was more Butlins than Kabal. An inviting dry ski slope populated with scores of local children overlooked the pitch, the sun shone brightly, and an opposition content to play nice hockey, full of neat patterns and potential, but lacking the aggression or conviction up front to pose a serious threat. Even the umpires steered clear of creating any bad feelings or controversy, officiating fairly and consistently throughout.

2-0 up at half time, 5-0 at the end, this was a game blissfully devoid of the tribulations and tight spots in which we have found ourselves in recent weeks. We played composed passing hockey on the slick surface, growing in stature and playing more expansively with every goal we scored.  When things are going your way, short corners go in, and indeed we scored from a succession of routines. Mention must also go to Dave Catchpole, whose opening goal, a reverse stick bullet from the top of the D, was right out of the top drawer, albeit with the extended personal jubilation and celebrations that followed only too quick to remind everyone in the vicinity of the pitch of this fact.

With 2^nd and 3^rd both winning, our lead remains at 6 points. 7 points from the last 5 games will secure promotion, with a home game against table-dwelling Fight Club-auditioning Luton Town on Saturday presenting the opportunity to take another big step towards achieving this goal. 2pm push back at Warners, all support welcome.

Andy